The Drake found himself holding two glass jars of green liquid. He stared at them and then recalled one of his notes on Erin Solstice. Gingerly, he backed out of the kitchen and put the jars on a table.

The idea of Liscor’s watch keeping written notes on Erin is very funny to me, that must be one hell of a file to read through.

On the other hand, no one dared use the grid for transporting people anymore. There had been…incidents. And one in forty thousand deliveries went astray. Sometimes in a minor or amusing way. Sometimes never to be seen again.

I do hope Erin’s door is an exception to this, it seems so because portals vs teleportation. Also, I wonder if astray is literal as in things ending up not where they’re meant to, or it means things being rebuilt incorrectly… an ominous thought.

Ilvriss shook his head. He looked at everything differently than when he’d left, come to that. It felt like the world hadn’t changed. But he had. And it was an uncomfortable feeling. Things that had mattered in the past didn’t now. While other things mattered more.

Ilvriss really has had a lot of development, he’s almost completely changed from when he was introduced and for the better too. I look forward to seeing more from this covert operation of his.

Ilvriss stood up and Saliss paused. -> Salisa

Osthia felt a chill. She got what Ilvriss was saying at.

^She got the point//She knew what he was getting at.

Glad to see I am not the only one.
I feel like it is unlikely to happen. But I love their relationship, and I think they would work well together in a romantic one.

“Lost in thought, Ilvriss glanced up and saw Saliss returning” Salisa or whatever the name was.

“It was even more distinctive when she wore a Human’s body. She waved a claw awkwardly.”

This sounds like Jelaqua’s new body (“Different body, same grin.”) is human, except that humans don’t have claws.

“Of course, what else was a son of Salazsar to do when they’d been away from their home and thus, culture, for so long?”

Misplaced comma; should be “home, and thus culture,” Since “son” is definately male, possibly it should also be “he’d been away from his home”.

“The complexity of the sound contained within is somewhat above average, but for a conversation in numerous parts or music, I would expect it to be.”

There is something wrong with the last clause of this sentence. Possibly it could be “music, this is what I would expect.”.

“Well, most who lived or battled monsters died far earlier.”

Those who live do not die, be definition. Do you mean “lived near”?

“Oh. Its summer, isn’t it?”

“Its” should be “it’s”.

“And there will be a reason for us to approach such people completely covertly.”

From the context, “covertly” should be “overtly” or “openly”.

“Store houses. The ever-reaching mines.”

Should be “Storehouses.”.